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Landy
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Postitus Postitas Landy »

4wd Vehicle Acronyms


Here are the real meanings behind the names of these 4wd manufacturers and their vehicles. Clicking on a "pic" link will reveal a picture of said vehicle either rolled, stuck, or in some situation that I thought was funny at the time; click your browser's back button to return to the Humour page.

Most of these were created by me; at least give me credit when you plagiarise them.


Acura - Apparently Cheap U-joints Replaced Again

MDX - My Driveshaft Xploded

AM General - Apparently My Girth Enables Neophytes to End Rollovers At Last

Hummer - Huge Unwieldy Monster Mashes Every Rock

Asuna - Annoyingly Slow Under Normal Acceleration

BMW - Break My Windows / Bought My Wife

Buick - Butt-Ugly Imitation Cadillac Kitsch

Rendezvous - Roads Easily Negotiated Demand Extra Zeal; Vibration Overwhelms Unsuspecting Simpleton

Cadillac - Crashed After Driver Intercepted Low-Level Air Craft

Escalade - Embarrassed Stockbrokers Can Always Lie About Dead Electronics

Chevrolet - Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time

Avalanche - After Victims Acquire Lease, Annoying Noises Constantly Heard Everywhere

Blazer - Bought Lemon; A Zillion Electrical Recalls (pic)

Silverado - Seized Injectors Lack Velocity; Exciting Roll Abruptly Detains Owner

Suburban - Stretched Useless Blazer Uses Rusty Bolts And Nails

Tahoe - Total Amateur Hates Onerous Electronics / Take A Hike, Or Else

Daihatsu - Damages Axles In Highly Advanced Technical Situations, Unfortunately

Rocky - Rolled Over Cliff; Keep Yanking

Dodge - Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere

Dakota - Damned Amateurs, Keep Out of Tough Areas

Durango - Drives Unusually Rough And Never Goes Offroad

Ram - Replace All Motors / Really Awful Mechanicals

Ramcharger - Radiator And Motor Can't Handle A Relatively Gentle Easy Road

Ford - Forget Off Road Driving / Found On Rocks Disabled / Flip Over, Read Directions / or upside down: Driver Returns On Foot / Damaging Rust Overwhelms Frame (pic1) (pic2) (pic3) (pic4) (pic5)

Bronco - Body Rust Overwhelms New Car Owner

Escape - Easy Sidehills Can Alter People's Expectations

Excursion - Expansive Xenophiliac's Cursed Urban Ride Slowly Impairs Owner's Neurons

Expedition - Exorbitant Xeroxed Product Embarrasses Driver Incessantly; Tow It Out Now

Explorer - Expansive Xeric Pastures Leave Our Ride Easily Rolled

Ranger - Retarded Accelleration Needlessly Gets Engine Roaring / Reverse And Neutral Gears Explode Rapidly

Message to Ford Motors: Stop using the letter "x", I'm running out of words!!

Geo - Gross Exhaust Odour

Tracker - Tough Road Action Creates Knocking Engine Rods

GMC - Got a Mechanic Coming? / Get My Come-along / Garbage Master Cylinder / or upside down: Couldn't Make the Grade / Corroding in My Garage

Denali - Docile Engine Needs A Little Injection

Envoy - Expensive New Vehicle Of Yuppies

Jimmy - Jump Into My Mother's Yacht (pic1)

Sonoma - Suddenly Overturned Near Old Mainline Access

Yukon - Yelling Usually Keeps Owners Nonviolent

Holden - High Output Lights Drain Energy Notoriously

Frontera - Frightening Roll-Over Necessitates Training; Engine Rattles Annoyingly

Jackaroo - Junky Air Conditioning Keeps All Registered Owners Oblivous

Honda - Had One, Never Did Again

CRV - Crappy Recalled Vehicle / Crying Reveals Victim

Pilot - Painfully Inadequate Loser Overturns Truck

Hyundai - Help! Yells Unimpressed Newbie, Disappointed After Introduction

Santa Fe - Sluggish Automobile Notoriously Tepid And Fools Everyone / Sad Attempt Not Too Advanced, Fails Early

Isuzu - It Slowly Undermines Ziebart's Undercoating

Amigo - Aliens Might Investigate Grabbing One

Rodeo - Rides On Dry Earth Only

Trooper - Towing Recommended Out Of Pitifully Easy Rocks

Vehicross - Very Easy Hill Invites Crazy Roll Over Side Slopes

Jeep - Just Enough Extra Parts / Jinxed Engine Eats Pistons / Jerks Exploring Every Pasture / Joke Electronics Exceptionally Poor / Just Empty Every Pocket

CJ - Cheap Junk / Children's Jeep / Childish Joke / Claim Jumper

Grand Cherokee - Grandmother's Ride Allows No Droop; Can't Hear Expensive Radio Over Knocking Engine and Exhaust (pic1) (pic2) (pic3)

Liberty - Laughable Inferior Box Easily Rolls, Terrifying You

MJ - My Junk / Motor's Junk / Mom's Jeep / Moronic Jerk

Scrambler - Sad Crawl Ratio Always Makes Boring Life Excitingly Real

Renegade - Rolls Easily, Negating Emergency Gear And Destroying Everything

TJ - Tomorrow's Junk / Tow Job / Try Jacking / Transmission Jammed / Total Joke

Wagoneer - Willfully Atrocious Garbage; Obviously No Engineering Expertise Required

XJ - Xeno Junk

YJ - Yesterday's Junk / You Jerk / Yuppy's Jeep

ZJ - Zero Juice / Zoological Joke

Kia - Keep It Away / Killed in Action / Know It All (Ayeee!)

Sportage - Stupid Psychotic Owner Roasts Transmission And Gets Embarrassed

Lada - Lost And Dumfounded Again

Niva - No Inherent Value at All

Land Rover - Laughing At New Driver, Rolled On Very Easy Road

County - Crazily-Overpriced Unit Normally Taxi's Yokels

Defender - Driver Easily Forgets Everything; Normally Disabled on Every Rock

Discovery - Driver Ignorant; Saves Cash to Own a Very Expensive Ride for Yuppies

Range Rover - Replace All New Gears Eventually; Risk Of Violently Exploding Rear

Lincoln - Lousy Incompetant Numbskull Crashes; Obviously Legally Negligent

Navigator - Not A Very Interested Glance At This Overpriced Ride

Mazda - Mindless Automaton Zipping Dangerously Along

MPV - Mind Painfully Vacant (pic1) (pic2)

Navajo - Not A Vehicle A Judge Owns

Tribute - Terrifying Roll Into Bushes Ultimately Totalled Exterior

Mercedes - Many Easily Roll & Careen Effortlessly Down Endless Slopes

ML - More Lift / Money Lost / Moronic Loser

Unimog - Uncomfortable Noisy Imposing Monstrosity Often Grinds

Mercury - My Easily-Rolled Car Usually Requires Yanking

Mountaineer - Man Overjoyed Until New Transmission And Injectors Negate Electronics, Exploding Rapidly

Mitsubishi - Mournfully I've Tried Spending Unlimited Bucks; I Still Hate It

Montero - My Overrated New Truck Easily Rolls Over

Pajero - Poorly-Assembled Junk; Engine Replaced Often
Nissan - Now I'm Stuck, Send Another Nissan

Pathfinder - People Assume These High-Flying Idiots Normally Drive Easy Roads (pic)

Patrol - Phone A Taxi; Ripped Off Leafs
Hardbody - Happy And Retarded Driver Basically Only Delivers Yuppies

Frontier - Foolish Registered Owner Needs To Investigate Engine Replacement

Murano - Many Unnecessary Repairs Aggravate New Owners
Xterra - Xtreme Terrain Easily Rolls Risky Auto
Oldsmobile - Overpriced Leisurely-Driven Sport-ute, Made Of Buick's Irregular Leftover Equipment / Oh Look Dear, Some Massive Oil-Burning Idiot's Leaking Everywhere

Bravada - Beats Riding A Very Ancient Dodge Aspen

Pontiac - Parting Out Now, Totalled It After Collision

Sunrunner - Some Unsuspecting Newbie Rolls Uncontrollably on Nice Normal Easy Roads

Saturn - Slow Americans Take Unmarked Roads Nowhere

Vue - Very Ugly Exterior / Very Useless Engine

Subaru - Something Usually Breaks And Renders it Useless

Brat - Beats Riding A Tricycle

Outback - Obviously Useless Transmission Breaks; Air Conditioning Kills

Suzuki - Slid Under Zooming Unimog; Killed Instantly

Grand Vitara - Grossly Restricted Articulation Normally Denotes Very Interesting Time At Rocky Areas

Samurai - Small Automobile Makes Urinals Really Appear Immense

Sidekick - Slow Ineffectual Deathtrap Endangers Kin In Collision Knockout

Tatra - Terrifyingly-Abominable Trash Receptable Approaches

Volvo - Very Old Lady's Vehicle Only

Laplander - Last And Probably Lowest-Achieving National Defense Emergency Ride

Willys - We Invariably Like Long Yank Straps / What Incompetent Losers Like, Yes Siree




To be fair: (and don't let me catch you posting this on your non-Toyota website!)


Toyota - Tipped Over, Yanked Out To Asphalt

Highlander - Hopelessly Incompetent Grandpa Hates Lifts And Needs Daily Energy Ration

Land Cruiser - Lost And Needs Directions, Can't Return Until Idiot Searches Every Road

RAV4 - Really Awful Valueless 4wheeler

Tundra - Totally Uncoordinated New Driver Rolls Always
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Lets talk about LAND ROVER's
Kristjan Vaarmann (+372)5010599 kristjan.vaarmann@landroverclub.ee
Land Rover'iga nakatatud aastast 1996, off-road spordis aastast 2003!
MTÜ Eesti Land Roveri Klubi
margus4x4ee
Got ARB and Nitrous?
Postitusi: 190
Liitunud: L Veebr 14, 2004 4:11 pm
Asukoht: 53496602

Postitus Postitas margus4x4ee »

go kotkas!
daffid
Got ARB and Nitrous?
Postitusi: 196
Liitunud: R Juun 06, 2003 8:47 am

Postitus Postitas daffid »

daff naerab sydamest. kotkas lihtsalt s6itis julmalt sisse..
TreilaMees
Rookie
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Liitunud: P Apr 23, 2006 8:41 pm

Postitus Postitas TreilaMees »

Ford ... Fix Or Repair Daily, Found On the Road Dead, Fast Only Rolling Downhill
kala
DJ ja AÜ
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Liitunud: K Nov 10, 2004 11:57 am
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Postitus Postitas kala »

bmw-big money waste
56157755
Earl
Off Roader Wannabe
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Liitunud: T Apr 04, 2006 8:51 am
Asukoht: Tallinn

Postitus Postitas Earl »

BMW - bojevaja mashina võmogatelei (vene k. "väljapressijate lahingumasin" vms.)
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FB
Fitting 38"
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Liitunud: T Okt 18, 2005 7:54 pm
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Postitus Postitas FB »

Fordiomanikud saavad surres otse taevasse - põrgu on maa peal läbitud...
Metsas, vahelduva eduga, alates 2002a. Suvesõidust

Pakun laadur - ekskavaatorite-, kallurite- ja hüdrokraanadega madelautode teenuseid.
56614969
kala
DJ ja AÜ
Postitusi: 1381
Liitunud: K Nov 10, 2004 11:57 am
Asukoht: viimsi

Postitus Postitas kala »

mis on ühist opelil ja tampoonil?
Kui pu...s pole siis on nööriga sabas :D
oli vist õieti öeldud,kusagilt jäi nagu meelde!
56157755
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